He knew every desire she had and it turned him on. He began using her fantasies to fuel his own orgasms. For the next week, it was awkward. She was avoiding him. He was avoiding her. They rarely made eye contact, because they couldn’t stop thinking about having sex. It was a personal Hell for both of them. Saturday, after Mary, left for work, Ray approached her. “Ginny” he said in his best Forrest Gump voice. “We need to talk.”Ginny responded, “about what daddy?”“I have a confession, sweetie.” He meekly replied, as he took a deep breath.“What did you do this time.” She asked in a joking tone. “Ummm... I sorta read your.... journal.” He muttered. Continuing, “it was open, I am so sorry.” He saw the embarrassment on her face before she buried it her hands. “No, no, no, it’s ok. Nothing to feel ashamed of... I am the the one who should be ashamed.” He continued, “I couldn’t stop reading it.” “I can’t lie, I can’t stop thinking about you... I love you like your my own daughter, yet I am. (LaKeesha, as the older male-to-female blackwoman who had been doing this longer, had really become the major mentorfigure and older sista' to me)."It just be da' life of a successful middle-class black woman," saidLaKeesha. "Yo husband gots to be at work, and you's just focus on beingthe wife and lookin' pretty." I accepted this as just "the way thingsare."I did work hard on my female image. I got so good at doing makeup, andchoosing the right outfits that showed off my hot ass. It was so greathaving a helper with experience like LaKeesha guiding me and stopping mefrom making all of the mistakes that she had made. She had done this allbefore, so she really tightened me up on getting me presented as aperfect black woman, and in smoothing out all my rough edges.When I had had enough with "black girl practice," or I had down time, I'dwatch things like movies with Angela Basset. I'd imagine I was thepretty black woman in the film getting deflowered by her strong blacklover. I'd.
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